Baby gates are the exact equivalent to, “This area is locked until you’ve gained more experience.”
This year has probably given Cards Against Humanity enough material for a stand alone 2017 special edition..
Procrastinating is hoping that future you isn’t as lazy as current you.
The first actor who said “curses” while playing a villain may have just been reading the stage directions.
An assassin is just a serial killer who takes requests.
A child is the most expensive thing you can get for free.
Candy corn is just corn turned into corn syrup then back into corn.
There was a moment in time that your mom or dad picked you up, put you down and never did it again.
When you smile you are showing as much of your skeleton as possible without injuring yourself.
You’ve never seen your real face — only pictures and reflections.
If you’re over 30, you were alive before every dog in the world.
Humans cut down bird’s houses to make bird’s houses.
Finally, if you are reading this -out of the millions of ways you can die – you’ve avoided all of the them. Congratulations!