Skip to content

Our Digital Dust

Reflections on three fathers' experience and lives for our kids

July 22, 2017 – 100%

admin June 22, 2017 No Comments

I had a surprise visit today from an previous colleague who gave me the wonderful news that he’s going to be a father. This was a surprise to him and his wife as they weren’t really planning to have kids anytime soon. He’s not taking the surprise very well and I could see it on his face. When I asked him if he was happy, the response was muted at best. As a guy who always wanted to be a dad and who enjoys every minute with my kids, I had a difficult time understanding his reaction. We talked a little longer and then he asked me how to be a good dad. With Father’s Day occurring last weekend, the topic was timely, but I couldn’t come up with any immediate pearls of wisdom for him. And he looked really worried. You see this guy has the grandest of aspirations and this surprise is putting those aspirations at significant risk. He talked about that a little and told me he’s worried that he won’t be able to give his best to all the different roles and relationships. Finally, he gave me a the opening I needed. I used to have the same concern; always trying to be everything to everybody and failing miserably, in my humble opinion, at all of my roles and relationships. But somehow, I came to realize that I can’t give 100% as a boss, 100% as an employee, 100% as a husband, 100% as a dad, 100% as a friend, 100% as a coach, etc, etc, etc.  That comes out to 600% and even I know that math doesn’t work. We talked about this and I told him he just needs to be 100% in the moment. We’ll always fall short of our own expectations, but if we follow one of my coauthors advice to be fully present in the present, we’ll have a positive influence on whoever we’re with at the time. We only have 100% of ourselves to give and it just can’t be divvied up no matter how hard we try.

Share this:

  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)

Related

Daily Post

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

June 2017
M T W T F S S
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930  
« May   Jul »

Recent Posts

  • Welcome to a New Year?
  • January 3, 2021 – We are back for 2021!
  • April 18, 2018 – 51 and still a child
  • February 23, 2018 – If I Were the Devil
  • February 9, 2018 – That Forever Person

Recent Comments

  • Bob Hale on Welcome to a New Year?
  • ROBERT HALE on January 3, 2021 – We are back for 2021!
  • Sharon M Hale on January 3, 2021 – We are back for 2021!
  • Bob Hale on December 23/24, 2017 – Merry Christmas
  • Bob Hale on December 22, 2017 – Winter Soulstice

Archives

  • January 2021
  • April 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017

Our Twitter Feed

Follow @@ourdigitaldust

Digital Dust
@ourdigitaldust

  • We have a new post at #ourdigitaldust! New post: Welcome to a New Year? https://t.co/xdeWTPs78Q
    about 1 week ago
  • We have a new post at #ourdigitaldust! New post: April 18, 2018 – 51 and still a child https://t.co/USQ29VbhSu
    about 3 years ago
  • We have a new post at #ourdigitaldust! New post: February 23, 2018 – If I Were the Devil https://t.co/frPKB0lwdh
    about 3 years ago
  • We have a new post at #ourdigitaldust! New post: February 9, 2018 – That Forever Person https://t.co/SXqcfSebuz
    about 3 years ago
  • We have a new post at #ourdigitaldust! New post: February 7, 2018 – Digging Archaeological Trenches https://t.co/FuXWyqpBE3
    about 3 years ago
  • We have an updated post at #ourdigitaldust! Post Edited: January 26, 2018, Natura naturans https://t.co/va0zxj1jF3
    about 3 years ago
  • We have an updated post at #ourdigitaldust! Post Edited: January 26, 2017, Natura naturans https://t.co/va0zxj1jF3
    about 3 years ago
  • We have a new post at #ourdigitaldust! New post: January 26, 2017 Natura naturans https://t.co/va0zxj1jF3
    about 3 years ago
  • We have an updated post at #ourdigitaldust! Post Edited: January 21, 2017 – Book Review, The Leading Brain https://t.co/b3CxiiLaui
    about 3 years ago
  • We have a new post at #ourdigitaldust! New post: January 21, 2017 – Book Review, The Leading Brain https://t.co/b3CxiiLaui
    about 3 years ago
Copyright © 2021. Our Digital Dust
Powered By WordPress and Silver Quantum